Yesterday’s cry was much needed because I feel so much better today!
Whenever my friends and I spend time down by the river, we always go out to eat afterwards. Great news for me! So I sat there with my water trying to hold a conversation while my friends eat their shrimp flatbread and sliders :/
I felt really bad about not ordering while at dinner since waiters live off of tips. Luckily my friends ordered a few margs to make up for me not ordering anything.
They wanted to continue eating out by going to Carl’s. One of my friends asked if I wanted some ice cream and I happily declined. She asked if she bought it for me, if I would take it and again I said no. I didn’t want people to buy my things just to make me feel included because that’s not the point of the Challenge. I easily shut her down by saying I get indigestion from ice cream (which I do).
One of my friends turned 21 this week and threw a party. She gave away free jell-o shots and gave me one…I definitely could have gone with out it but in celebration for her birthday I took it. I felt guilty taking it but figured she would only celebrate her 21st birthday once.
As I mentioned in earlier posts, I had told my close friends about being on the Challenge. But one of my friends just recently came back into town and understands that I am on the Challenge but highly encouraged me to take the shot by continuously saying, “free, free, free!”
It’s interesting to see those I am currently surrounded by supporting me while those who just know about it yet don’t understand or see the struggles I face while being on the Challenge has really opened my eyes. Like we discussed in class, they feel guilty knowing that I’m on the Challenge and don’t want to feel sorry for me. Yet, they won’t participate in it themselves.